Love and scandal are the best sweeteners of tea.

Find yourself a cup; the teapot is behind you. Now tell me about hundreds of things.

Tea in our digital age or T, is slang for gossip especially on social media. To give Tea, means to tell a story or share a scoop most probably about celebrities. You can give Tea, get Tea or spill Tea. Using the nature of Tea, (that it is Hot) is the slang way of saying, hot gossip or a juicy story. So, one could say “Girl, what’s the Tea”. If you prefer not to gossip you can say “No Tea” or if your concerned about someone “What’s your Tea”? Spilling tea means to gossip about someone.

Extract from Urban Dictionary on “Sipping Tea”

Present participle of “to sip tea”usually a meme in social media or chat room context of quietly, discretely or otherwise shrewdly taking part in verbal disclosure of some valuable, interesting or otherwise useful information. Whether in context of gossip or rumours about a celebrity or an important event or other information of value to the listener. The listener quietly sips tea as they drink in the information also.

The slang use of the word Tea, is said to have originated from “the custom in the American South of women who gather in the afternoon to drink tea and gossip.” As is the custom in the UK, Ireland and just about everywhere else. Nothing like a cuppa to start a good chat, share a confidence or to embellish a story!

Since afternoon Tea began in the English Court in the middle of the 17th century, by Catherine of Braganza. The fashion spread to the middle classes in the 18th century, and women set in motion a ritual that remains popular today. An afternoon respite to talk, drink tea and gossip. The ritual began because men were accustomed to going out to lunch or coffee houses for the afternoon, to talk to their contemporaries about business and politics, and women were left at home. Dinner was the formal meal and served late, so to alleviate the hunger of a very long afternoon, tea began to be drunk by the elite classes.

Queen Victoria herself established her love of afternoon tea and it then became commonplace for women to invite friends over for tea in the late afternoon. It was a fashionable and enjoyable opportunity for a delicious snack of biscuits, cakes, the tea table and also an opportunity to share news, whispers and stories.

Later, Tea Emporiums and Tearooms became fashionable and were considered to be safe places for women to go alone to meet their friends. Afternoon Tea became a more lavish and elaborate party for people to share the tea table, talk over scandals or titbits of news in the Tatler or Ladies Fashionable Repository. The upper and middle classes were the forerunners of afternoon tea that provided an opportunity for women to express their fashion sense, and to display refinement and elegance in their conduct, but it was also an example of women’s place in a patriarchal society.

On the other hand, poor and working class women were chastised for excessive tea drinking and for not abiding to the rules of etiquette for the tea table. Women who did not uphold the strict social rules and etiquette were called ignorant and were thought to be undermining their family and society with the over consumption of Tea.

Popular art and literature of the 1800’s reflected the social issues of unregulated tea-drinking by upholding high standards, propriety and respectability or by expressing a comedic outlook and satirical view of women and the Tea Table.

As we read in “Pride and Prejudice,” Mr Collins considered the invitation to have “Tea” with Lady Catherine to be a great honour bestowed upon Miss Elizabeth Bennet and her friends. An invitation to drink tea ‘at home’ was considered a huge honour.

The author Lewis Carroll in 1865, wrote one of the best examples of Tea Table TittleTat in Alice in Wonderland and The Mad Hatters Tea Party

“Take some more tea,” the March Hare said to Alice, very earnestly.
“I’ve had nothing yet,” Alice replied in an offended tone, “so I can’t take more.”
“You mean you can’t take less,” said the Hatter. “It’s very easy to take more than nothing.”

Satirists of the period like Anglo Irish author, Johnathan Swift (1667 –1745) believed that tea had a contrary effect upon the humours of the mind. They thought the tea-table was the playing field for feminine displays of backbiting and scandal. As he describes a lady enjoying her cup of tea:

“Surrounded with the noisy clans
Of prudes, coquettes and harridans.
Now voices over voices rise,
While each to be the loudest vies;
They contradict, affirm, dispute,
No single tongue one moment mute;
All mad to speak, and none to hearken,
They set the very lapdog barking;
Their chattering makes a louder din
Than fish-wives o’er a cup of gin;
Far less the rabble roar and rail
When drunk with sour election ale.”

Journal of a Modern Lady Swift.

It is not only a sense of scandal and gossip that Tea imbibes but the role of confidante, as in William Makepeace Thackeray’s book Pendennis.

What a part of confidante has that poor tea
pot played ever since the kindly plant was
introduced among us! What myriads of
women have cried over it, to be sure! What
sick beds it has smoked by! What fevered lips
have received refreshment from it! Nature meant
very kindly by women when she made the tea-
plant; and with a little thought, what a series
of pictures and groups the fancy may conjure
up and assemble round the teapot and cup.

“I’ll take tea in my room she said coldly, and I’m not in the mood for gossip”

Merry Christmas Mrs Minerva by Edmund Cooper

Tea drinking now in 2020 has come a long way since the stuffy drawing rooms of Victorian and Edwardian England. Our rituals today, are widely diverse ranging from the rapidly growing trend and love of fruit, flower and herbal infusions and individual private tea blends. To Japanese Tea ceremonies and Matcha green, White and Pu-erh Teas, to the ever popular lavish High Teas enjoyed in the grandest of Hotels around the world. Your favourite brew of Earl Grey, English Breakfast, Oolong or Orange Pekoe enjoyed with a friend at home, in a cafe or a Tearoom. No matter where we enjoy our Tea just remember,

” Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.”

Eleanor Roosevelt.

All content Di Baker February 2020 with thanks to Wiki medi, Unsplash and Simply Feminine for the images. Read more on the history of Afternoon Tea here

Title quote by Henry Fielding (1707-1754) “Love in Several Masques”